Sunday, October 08, 2006

Azmee Khaled - I can't even see my Wife in this HAZE and I'm horneee... - Planet Bongbonga -49th

HAMKALING JAYA: Punish them! That is what Natural Noise and Air-waves Environment Minstrel Datuk Seri Azmee Khaled has to say to the Indonesian Government about Malaysian Newscasters in Indonesia which may be polluting the air waves.

Malaysia will not protect any Malaysian newscasters in Indonesia which may be contributing to the haze by broadcasting unsanctioned radio waves which causes the Haze blanketing the entire South-East Asia Car-Park.

Spot the Curves in the Haze if you can!

“We are not here to mute anyone, and we implore Indonesia to impose the most severe gag under their law to anyone found guilty,” he said while rubbing the poster of his famous ex-newscaster wife, NoMale SameSardin.

Azmee's comments were in reply to reports in the Indonesian media that some of the culprits involved in open Noise-Haze were Malaysian-owned broadcasting companies.

“However, even the Indonesian Government has confirmed that the Noize(Noise +Haze – mob) is coming from the traditional open transmission activities of CB-radios and not our propaganda…err I meant broadcasting companies.

“But I would like to reiterate that Malaysia will not condone any activity done by its own mikes or speakers.”

Azmee, who was attending a Genital dysfunction in Kangaroo, Perlis, said the Noize caused by unlicensed broadcasting was also very bad there contributing to erectile-dysfunction of attendees!

When asked if Malaysia would submit a formal podcast protest to Indonesia regarding the Noize, Azmee said the Government could send any kind of air-waves it wanted which would contribute to even more Noize.

“But I don’t think it would be of any use. The Indonesian Government is well aware of the problem and the only request Malaysia has is for the problem to be solved,” he said while caressing NoMale’s lingerie.

Azmee said it was imperative that Indonesia ratified the Asean transboundary Noize agreement and urged Jakartatata again to do so, adding that no one knows why it was dragging its feet and tails over the agreement.

“Only when Indonesia ratifies the agreement can member countries set up a Noize centre so that prevention and extinguishing of illegal soundwaves can be done easily.”

When asked if Asean members would convene any sort of emergency meeting to discuss action against the Noize, Azmeei said there was no point talking any more while hugging a 1/10 scale doll of his wife.

“What we need is action and enforcement,” he blurted with dripping his eyeballs with EyeMo.

In PeKanNeeNia, Deputy Primo Minstrel Datuk Seri Najeeb Tun Lazat said the Noize problem would plague the region for years to come unless Asean countries were willing to pool their sound resources to combat the menace. “We have been discussing among the members but we have yet to reach a consensus on the setting up of a Noize fund,” said while putting on his favourite Maybabeline Toast-Almond Extreme Moisture lipstick.

“Right now, one of the most needed equipment would be Gigantic Audio-Vacuums made with Dinosaur Egg shells. They are expensive witchcraft but would help alleviate or at least reduce the soundhaze problem,” he said. Najeeb, who is also the Home Vacuum Minstrel, said the Noize was a mute issue.

Asked if Asean members had volunteered their services to help the Indonesian Government to put out the Noize, he said there were offers but there had not been any positive response to accept the assistance.

After the press conference: Datuk Seri Azmee Khaled has to TFK/Choke his chicken/masturbate/manually relieve himself provided he could find his tiny and limp penis.


Mob reporting for Intergalactic Crap News Express of Planet Bongabonga -49th.
We BONG first so you can SNORT!